Unlikely Grace

My Dearest Sister,

The topic this month holds a special place in all of our hearts; for without God’s amazing grace you and I would still be lost in our wretched sinful selves, without hope!  Praise God for His mercy and love which He has so graciously lavished upon us and has allowed us to be called “His children”!!! Praise Him, Praise Him that it is so by no merit of our own!!!

My heart’s desire in writing you this letter is to share with you a time when God’s grace came to me and my family in an unexpected even unlikely manner.  It was such a small thing in the grand scheme of things as they say.  The grand scheme, if you will, was my daughter’s life long battle with seizures.  She was 14 at the time and had just undergone brain surgery where a neurosurgeon severed the right hemisphere of her brain from the left hemisphere.  The journey our family traveled to that moment was strenuous and filled with many tears.  Just when it seemed things would calm down to a point where growth could take place those nasty seizures would show their ugly head again to disrupt any progress that had been made in our daughter’s life.

Don’t get me wrong, our path was definitely sprinkled with joy as well along the way.  However, most days held a quality of oppressive uncertainty to it.  Eventually we made it to a group of Dr.’s that could see the problem and offered a solution that promised (albeit a very slim promise) an end to her besetting seizures.  Test upon test led her to an operating room where for six hours we heard very little….and then finally: all went well, she is stable, the permanent separation was complete.

In the ICU we were told the next 24 hours of her recovery would be critical to the outcome of the surgery: she could reject what just took place, she could start to seize again, she could bleed out in her brain causing irreparable damage, she might not wake up for days…the list went on.  It was late in the day when we  began to see signs of her waking up, but no one wanted to rejoice for after all that little bit of hope might be fleeting!  All the emotions that had been set aside in the making of the decisions that brought us there to that moment seemed to well up and over flow all at once, uncontrollably we wept.  Then, in came the nurse who would be caring for her through the night.  I cannot even recall her face although when she smiled I got the sense that something unforgettable was about to happen. She said “Hello, my name is Grace….” I do not even recall anything else she said!

For those of you who know me well, you know that I am not one to read too much into ordinary things, nor am I someone that reads between the lines.  However, at that particular moment I knew without a doubt that God used this sweet nurse’s name to speak peace into my heart when my heart was tempted to doubt Him and all the lovingkindnesses He had shown us up to that time.

As her name was spoken my heart recalled that it was by God’s grace that my daughter had even survived beyond the first trimester of gestation and the stroke that took place, it was by God’s grace that her condition was discovered when it was, it was God’s grace that sustained her life and ours and that allowed us to always look beyond all the medical prognoses, it was by God’s grace that Olivia’s God given personality was protected and reserved for a time when all the seizures would be gone and the medicines would no longer play a part in her life, it is by God’s grace that He  taught me the sweetest, deepest things of Himself through Olivia’s life!

I pray that this simple recollection of mine would help to open your eyes and your heart to God’s grace for you today! Do not let the small things in your life that take place slip by without seeing His gracious omnipotent hand!

“My grace all sufficient shall be thy supply…”

~Susan

A Clean Slate Everyday

My Dear Sister,

I want to thank you for the kindness which you showed me recently. Your tender words and compassionate listening watered my heart like an afternoon rain shower does a dry thirsty garden. For this I am grateful.

However, it was the reflection of our Lord that brought joy to my heart. Even though His reflection brought light to my sin. It’s exposure led to my confession, forgiveness and repentance thus drawing me nearer to Him.

Your kindness has reminded me of a verse that no matter how many times I read it causes my heart to melt at it’s Truth!!!

“This I recall to my mind, therefore I have hope. Through the LORD’s mercies we are not consumed, Because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning; Great is your faithfulness. ‘The LORD is my portion’, says my soul, ‘Therefore I hope in Him!'”
~Lamentations3:21-2

The Lord shows me His kindness every morning by reminding me that my slate is clean each day!
I pray that His kindness towards you blesses your heart as it does mine.

Grace and peace to you,
Your sister Susan

Go… Run… Now!

My dear sister,

We have walked together down this long road before. In fact I can still hear your voice the last time we trod through this valley…”I want my denarii back; ALL OF IT!!!”  It broke my heart then dear sister to hear you proclaim UN-forgiveness toward your brother in Christ and to demand retribution for his sin against you.  Was he wrong? Yes!  Did he owe you his humble apology? Yes!  Did he walk in repentance and full obedience to his LORD succeeding his forgiveness? Yes, it is evident to all that he did and that he surely has!

But there you were and here we are once more, faced with the bitter truth that your heart has held on to his sin against you. My heart breaks again for you my dear sister; as one beggar for another who is desperately hungry for the Bread of Life. For isn’t it now you sweet sister who is in need of forgiveness?  Christ our glorious Savior left your sin (and mine) at the cross …. isn’t that where you ought to leave your brother’s? GO dear sister.  Indeed RUN to him NOW and seek his forgiveness for your UN-forgiveness toward him.

“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”  Eph. 4:32

Your sister~

Susan

Disappointment’s Slippery Slope

My Dearest Sister,

When last we spoke there was much discussion regarding our troubles and our disappointments.  We seemed to become bogged down not only in our words but in our spirits as well and unfortunately I sensed that we walked away without the comfort which normally flows from our hearts towards one another.

Today I am concerned in my spirit that I failed you my dear sister.   I know what you are thinking; “failed is such a strong word”.  However, I must call it what it is and rely on the Principle from God’s word:failure is not final.  What is this failure you might be asking? Simply put, I failed to redirect our troubled hearts from the disappointments in our lives to the One who not only knows them full well, but is the remedy for our woes.

Without this redirection (sometimes with the help of a faithful friend) our disappointments can quickly lead us down the slippery slope of all of those other “D” words: damage, destruction, deconstruction, devastation, discouragement,demands, disillusionment, depression and despair.  Without consistent committed redirection of our heart’s disappointment, we can be robbed of our joy! Indeed we can be robbed blind!  Blind to God’s goodness and mercy, His tenderness and forgiveness.  Granted, sometimes The disappointments of this life can be overwhelming and we become weak from their burdens.  That is when we lean harder upon the cross of Christ. It is with this leaning in we can continue on and that we are strengthened. It calls for our listening less to ourselves and talking more to ourselves.  Talking the Truth to ourselves that is!  The Truth is that God has given us “every spiritual blessing in heaven…In Christ” (Ephesians  1:3) The Truth is that “perfect love casts out fear” I John 4:18.   The Truth is that “all the paths of the Lord are mercy and truth unto such as keep his covenant..” Psalm 25:10  These are just a tiny drop in comparison to the ocean of Truth that God has so lovingly provided for us in His word.

Forgive me sister for thinking only of my own self and not seeking to encourage you, to help edify your spirit in our last conversation.  I am praying for you in the midst of your disappointment.  I am praying that you will seek to know what God has in mind for you to know of Him as you persevere through this season. Take heart sweet friend and remember that you are loved by God with an everlasting love!

Your sister in Christ,

Susan

The Watermark of Hope

My Dear Sister, I have been challenged day after day this month to not only find the time to sit and write to you, but to speak of this blessed topic in the midst of sorrow. However, even as I write those words the Holy Spirit convicts me deeply of how much more we/I need to be reminded of the glorious Hope that comes from God alone to His people. You see sister, typically this is a “teary” month at best for me. It is a month that brings with it the memories of a nine year old girl waking up one morning and no longer having an earthly father. Memories of my mother’s tears and groans of incompleteness after burying my father and returning home to a seemingly empty home and five children to raise alone. Memories of many episodes of life in our home when struggles occurred and wondering/ wishing “If only…..”. The memories have a way of finding their way forward out of the corners of my heart with the first Christmas song played in the season. As a Christian for thirty years now God has blessed me with His Truth and has given me the power through His Spirit to not only recognize this propensity I have to remember the sorrow, but to run to Him with it and to fall into His loving arms to receive His compassion once again. And when I do that He never fails to whisper into my heart the blessed hope I have through His Son!!! This loving whisper is like that of an artists watermark upon their masterpiece. It never disappears, it is there for the duration of the work of art and it declares ownership of the masterpiece. This is the hope I have in Christ. This is the hope that Peter calls “living” and which Paul calls “sure”, and “steadfast”. This year of 2011, and this particular month has brought more sorrow for me. The loss of a father in law that was a sweet kindhearted man and a sister in Christ at our church. Sometimes it seems the sorrow comes in the form of a flood and hearts grow weary. Dear sister, I am speaking to myself as well when I say that I am looking only unto Jesus today and although my vision is blurred with tears of sadness my sights are set and my faith is sure because God has placed His watermark of blessed hope upon my heart and I trust Him far more than anything/anyone that happens to be walking upon this frail earth. Where does your hope lie my dear sister? If you are still trying to love God and to place your hope in this world too, I encourage you to consider turning from the temptation to believe it is possible to do both. The Lord not only requires our undivided attention to His glory, but He alone is worthy of our undivided attention. His blessed hope is all that will remain when we depart from this earth. The sorrow and sadness of this earth comes and goes but the blessed hope we have in Jesus will not! “Blessed be the God and Father of Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His abundant mercy has begotten us again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance incorruptible (imperishable) and un-defiled and that does not fade away, reserved in heaven for you.” I Peter 1:3 Turn your eyes upon Jesus sweet sister look full in His wonderful face, and the things of this earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace.* Blessings upon blessings, Susan * Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus, Helen H. Hemmel,1922