Dear Sister,
There is a certain passage in the Bible that is my go-to when I can’t sleep at night, or when I am running or swimming those seemingly endless laps. They are not the typical motivational verses; in fact, the chapter begins with the author recounting how he resents God’s version of justice.
So why would I choose this particular chapter to regularly camp out in, memorize, and meditate out of the whole treasure of God’s Word? Well, because the writer questions God’s decisions to allow evil, lazy, prideful people to have abundance on earth and he finds the answer to his question about God’s justice (how often do I ask God “Why?!”). How is that justice good and right? The writer goes to church. There, in his time with God, his eyes are opened. He peers into the future of those people content without God. Their future is complete destruction. In His mercy and desire that none perish, God may be slow to wrath by our perception of time, but those who finally meet Him after choosing to shun Him throughout their lives will be utterly undone! No escaping, no hiding, no excuses, just stark, bold truth and devastating judgment.
Then, the author remembers in the midst of his jaw-clenching, passionate (even beast-like) resentment of God’s apparent injustice that his only recourse is to cling to God. There is no one, and nothing else on earth or heaven that can save (and which has imperishable, immeasurable worth) but God. He is God—there are no comparisons. He will do things incomprehensible to me, for I am like an infant in wisdom and righteousness.
“Nevertheless”
Defined: “in spite of that; notwithstanding; all the same.” Whatever I may think, whatever I may want, whatever I may do (or others do), He is my all: “I am continually with Thee.”
“You have taken hold of my right hand.” He holds me. My strength and convictions would surely be insufficient—what a comfort He has taken my hand. Those who choose to forsake or ignore God are destroyed. Resentment dissolves as I too decide, “But as for me, the nearness of God is my good; I have made the Lord God my refuge, that I may tell of all Your works.” (Psalm 73:1-28)
He is our all. Our hope, our promise, our treasure. Set aside any resentment you might have toward God, dear sister, for this is not our home—simply our race. The race is supposed to be difficult—testing us, refining us, stripping away the imperfect, building eternal muscle. Our reward will be hard won and that much more beautiful for the sacrifices. (Heb. 12:1-3)
Running with you,
Rebecca